I'm hiding from my hairdresser Part 2

I am sorry i have not finished this story but i was going through some things and i just need to laugh and get cheered up so what better way than to do that than updating my blogi!
Ok, so i left off at where Madam S finally got me to her house amidst all odds .. lol. She partitioned off a portion of her garage and turned it into a small cozy salon, but to get there you had to go through her living room which i quote directly as she said it " i don't know where you shoes have been so please take them off before entering my living room and put this slip -in on." Now you remember this was supposed to be a consult but apparently the reason she was spewing flames out of her ear was because the person who was supposed to be there cancelled their appointment and i was thinking, why are you taking your frustration out on me? You know common sense should have told me to run for my life, but i was somehow frozen (mumu alert!!) and i told her i would not mind doing my hair.... So she looked my hair over and then brought out a card and asked me to fill it out while she gave me her rules and regulations :
1. Do not come late
2. Do not bring any food or drinks to this place
3. Bring only cash - i was already guilt on this one: i don't carry cash!
4. Don't drive with the window down: it breaks your hair
5.Do not go swimming without hair protection
6.If you make an appointment for friday or saturday, don't bother calling to cancel, you will have to pay it anyway!
7. Do not use any other hair products except the ones i recommend.
.... By the time she was done, i was like "i don die ooo"...
Now ladies, i didn't know there was a proper way to sit in the chair at the hairdressers ooooo ! I was about to be schooled... Sitting in the chair, the cloth she put aound my neck half choking me, with the fear of man in my eyes, we were on our way..... She did not turn my neck this way or that like i thought she would, she wanted me to do it myself ??? she would say " can you not feel the direction i am pulling, and when i go in that direction she would yell and snap... " you are breaking my back, you are stressing me, you are the worst person to ever sit in this chair, you don't know how to position yourself, why can't you follow simple instructions" All this while i am seriously trying to do as she said but men, i was over powered, i was no match for her, so i just sat there and let her do her thing without a word!! I know mumu right?
On getting to the wash basin, which was located in her laundry room, that was the icing on the cake as in after pushing my behind far back into the chair like she said, i had to hold my head up for her and not push it back and not struggle with her, she just kept whinning.... well if she had space around the basin, she would be more comfortable i thought to myself!!
Then the flattening process, i think she burns people on purpose because i know there is a way for you to flat iron someone's hair without burning them, i mean my head kept zinging!! She blamed it on me of course and said i did not put my head right, i mean after you yap about something for a while and you don't get thru, just stop and adjust my head, but gently oo!! Lol
So we were done, my hair looked fabulous, it moved on its own and it was gorgeous.... But remember, i did not bring cash, so i got another lecture about that as well, but this time, i told her you know it was supposed to be a consult so don't blame for not bringing cash...
I went to an atm, got the cash, paid her and left....
I will write a couple more parts of this story later about people i referred and how they fared and more stuff on Madam S.... This was sisinaija reporting on true events!!! Lol